This year I declared that it was going to be a year of growth for myself, safe to say I haven’t been disappointed.
What’s sitting high on my dreams and desires board? Moving out, job raises, building my business are some of the keys.
This next period of my life was going to be focused on sowing the seeds, seeds of intentions and desires that when they would become a reality I would reap the rewards.
This meant work, devotion to my craft, putting in the effort, showing up each and every day, knowing that all of my hard work would compound over time till it paid off.
I knew that I was in for some work, some heavy lifting, and that it wasn’t going to be easy but it was going to be worthwhile. I also sensed challenges would arise purely for the fact I didn’t want to naively think it would all go smoothly.
And after feeling really good for a period of time, I finally found that snag that was going to trip me up. What did this look like for me? Well it showed up in lots of different ways.
- A lot of inner mean thinking’s that wanted to put me down to make me feel worthless.
- Picking fights with my partner and just generally being difficult.
- Procrastinating on work and not doing what needed to be done.
- Falling into the trap of thinking this day, week, month is almost over, why bother.
Interestingly though, something’s have been going incredibly well, I’ve been exercising the best I have been in a long time, my diet has been cleaned up and been clearing up so many health and hormone tweaks, you can find out more about diving into this here.
But every turn I took my mind wanted to make me feel less than because what I had desired hadn’t manifested yet, and it was getting impatient. Because this didn’t happen it mean’s you aren’t good enough. Something is wrong with you. That’s why you can’t have what you want.
My mind loved tripping me up in regards to wanting everything now. See, you and I live in a world where you can write down a goal, desire or intention and want it to be manifested instantly. You say, I’ve written it down, I want it, I’ve been working on it for 1 week, 1 month, or whatever and so I am ready.
This fascination of ours with instant gratification, what we see being the external world of people through social media, finished projects or just glossy pages can leave you feeling like you are behind and less-than.
In reality, all of what I am and you are going through is what everyone faces, every book, blog post, dance show, new business has so many trials, tribulations, set backs, doubts, mean-girl thinking. But you and I don’t see that. We often don’t speak about that, because it’s less than shiny. It’s also sometimes very private. So your inner mind will put you down for being less than the shiny-ness of somebody else’s social media, finished project or a glossy page.
I do not want to blame the world, society or other people. It doesn’t interest me. You and I, we actually make up society so if we change our thinking and viewing we can impact a greater change more than just blaming the way something works and letting it be.
Which brings me to today’s core point, how can you remain positive in a world that can be filled with instant gratification?
What can you do, to help you overcome this barrier?
CHANGE YOUR INNER DIALOGUE
Last year I often told my business coach I hated when people asked me about my business, because I felt like I was doing lots behind the scenes but on the outside I still didn’t have any coaching clients or was making any money.
My inner mind would have a field day, but then you don’t have a real business.
The reality, if I didn’t start, and work on what I was working on I wouldn’t be here writing to you now.
Now, when someone asks you how you are, let them peak behind the scenes with you. Tell them what is going on, what is happening and let them see that.
Instead of it being ‘I am doing nothing’ how about you fill them in on what you have actually been doing.
Let this be your guiding mantra: Be kind to yourself as you are moving towards what you want. Because you are moving towards your goal.
When you are getting fed up with it not manifesting yet, with your dreams not becoming a reality and it not happening fast enough. Because trust me I get it, there are certain real time things that depend on you reaching something, and so you might only be able to start saving money for your holiday when you get a pay increase so you have to do that first.
But when you get fearful, worried and nervous that it hasn’t happened yet and you immediately want to start blaming things outside of you, you have turned your back on trust.
You have allowed your voice of fear to become louder than your belief in yourself.
One of my favorite quotes, is those who are sure of the outcome can afford to wait, and wait without anxiety.
The question is whatever you are trying to create or manifest, when was the last time you took an active action to make it become a reality. Have you had a conversation with a boss, spoken to your partner, spoken to a travel agent.
What is a real world action you can take to help you moving forward closer towards your dreams?
ACCEPT IT OR CHANGE IT
Now this is where the fun really begins!
Let me invite you into my world for a moment. I have been with my partner for a long period of time, and we still haven’t yet to live together. This is something that I am so excited to be manifesting this year because I cannot wait to live with him and start this next phase of my life.
Now currently we are not living together and because I am choosing to not move in yet, due to real-life situations I therefore am still living at home. I am choosing not to change this, waiting for an alignment to move out. I am instead focusing on how can I accept this.
And not just begrudgingly accept this, how can I make this the best possible reality in this current moment? After all, me being resentful and dissatisfied with my current situation is in no way fun to be around and doesn’t help me bring what I want into my life, plus it’s just a general pain to be around for everyone!
So I am looking at it as I get to live at home, I get to spend time with my parents before this period ends, I am getting to have the fun of being rent-free for a little longer and focusing on what I do want to manifest into my life.
This is not an easy feat, but the more I keep focusing on getting to do these things, and how I am lovingly accepting and enjoying this current moment and making it the best (think bubble baths while I can, sleeping in the middle of the bed, pumping my 90’s jams) the happier I am, and the more pleasant I am to be around.
This can all still happen when I move out, but it’s focusing on making right now the best possible it can be. While still working on ambitions and goals I have in the future. See it is possible to love what you have right now while wanting more. It’s not black and white. It doesn’t change over night but the more you repeat what you want to believe, think the easier it becomes. The more you create these new neural pathways and habits you are reinforcing it until this becomes your new way of thinking, believing and actioning.
There we go, 3 tips to help you focus on remaining positive even we can be so focused on instant gratification. I’d love to hear from you, are you like me, is there something that you are trying to manifest, that is taking a while to show up? Let me know in the comments below, and I loved to hear how this has reframed your perspective.